I Am What You See?

Publisher: twinger      Volume No.  3      Issue No 9        Date June 5, 2004


As a mother, there comes a time where you have to draw a line in the sand during conflicts with your children. When the boys were small, one of these conflicts occurred over their desire to have “chili-bowl” haircuts. A wise friend told me at that time to learn to say yes to things that don’t matter, like hair that grows back, and to reserve no for important things like tattoos and earrings. Ryan and Reid like long, unkempt hair. Reid even remarked that he was going to let his grow all summer. Although I was not happy about this, I let the matter rest and tried not to let it bother me. Reid has a summer job cleaning windows in nice homes in Dallas for my bother, Matt. Matt has worked long and hard to cultivate his client list. Imagine my glee when I heard that the first thing Matt wanted Reid to do was get a haircut. It seems as though a longhaired window cleaner does not promote the right image for Matt’s well- heeled clients.


When I had my first job evaluation many years ago I was criticized for my slovenly appearance. My boss remarked that I looked as though I came dressed for work in the clothes I wore to bed the previous night. I was indignant that he could not find anything more significant to evaluate other than this. It took a long time for me to realize that he did me a great favor. I slowly realized that in order to be the boss, you had to acquire the necessary skills for the job, and you had to dress like the boss.


Papoo, my dad, says there are three kinds of people in this world: the fits, the misfits, and the counterfeits. The fits and the misfits are obvious, but it is the counterfeits you have to watch out for. It’s funny to me that I can be so sure about the character of someone only to be hurt by my mislaid perceptions. Papoo once told me that he doesn’t like to see Christian symbols on the back of peoples cars. He reasons that one shouldn’t need a fish to proclaim their Christianity; it should reflect itself through their everyday actions. I realize that perception is at the heart of our relationship with others. Just like Reid’s hair and my unkempt appearance, I should be mindful of what others see when they encounter me. I pray that I am not a counterfeit, but that my actions in this life are worthy of wearing the cross around my neck, or the fish on my car.

About dwinger

Former farmer, now college instructor
This entry was posted in Catholic, Children, Family, Listening for God, Marriage, Mary Teague Mail, Prayer, Questions and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to I Am What You See?

  1. asimplesinner says:

    That last picture is a doozey.

    You really just don’t see the “naked sexy lady sillouette” decales and the ichthys symbols paired together all that often…

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